Switching OT for Taekwondo

needs: Switching OT for Taekwondo

We just had too many appointments. Its ‘we’ because her appointments were mine to book, travel to, prepare and pay for. At that stage she was well enough for school 4 days a week.  4 days less Wednesday morning when she had tutoring. That brings her back to 3 ½ school days. Minus the 2 OT sessions where she missed a couple of hours. She was so fried after OT she would often not go back to school.  That leaves a total of 2 school days, and you could almost ensure there would be an incursion from the bank or Italian pizza day on one of them, which for a kid falling behind wasn’t really worth me washing a uniform and packing lunch for.

With all the signing-in late, or signing-out early, the woman in the office (they are always women) had gone from sympathetic (which I don’t really need) to judgement (which I really don’t need). My girl was struggling with learning difficulties and missed school made it impossible for her and frustrating for her teachers. Absence from school was also social quicksand for a girl who already missed the cues.

On Saturdays, we were having family Physio. It was all gym gear and laughter, but it was another appointment. Every practitioner brought their own view and their own homework to fit in. The family diet reverted to take out, and we were fractured. My boy was left behind, with others, and fell between the cracks and I really didn’t have the energy to talk to my beloved when he asked about my day. It was easier to say “fine”, than realise we were too tired to see it wasn’t.

The appointments, reviews and progress reports were good, bad and ugly. As a 5, 6, 7, 8-year-old she was well acquainted with “out of range” and the exercises targeted weakness, reinforcing (to her) that she was weak. Being a patient and being the Mum can be tough. It digs in and is a gateway to double chocolate caramel slice in sad waiting room cafés.

Somewhere in that merry go round I had coffee with the very best of friends; you know the one where you can say anything and she will make it ok. I got it all out, the way I felt about the appointments, the missed school, the woman in the office, the OT, the tutor, the Physio, the money, that I had to take her, the fact she had to go, what I was missing out on with my boy… I got it all out. And she said-

“Yeah, we dumped OT, you can’t go forever. Why don’t you try something instead?”

That’s where we were.  Now, I look at her in her taekwondo gear, strong and fierce without a shred of fragility and him proud in his black belt. Somewhere along the way, we committed to taekwondo like therapy, and it became their haven, their self-esteem and their strength.

means: We switched physical therapy for sport.

First up- if your kid needs physical therapy, get the therapy by whatever means you can and hit it as hard as you can because there are gains there to be made, small, big and life changing gains.

Switching in sport and switching out physical therapy got my dude back in the classroom.  Even if it was only for a weird incursion on the black cockatoo. It’s a day with their friends on a level playing field where they don’t have to wage the war against learning difficulties.

What sport? A sport or activity with:

  • a peer group outside school.
  • a uniform to belong.
  • a system of recognition because school recognition can be scarce.
  • something that works the brain, the left, the right brain and co-ordination.
  • without a team so they can go at their own pace.
  • something that makes them feel strong.

Why taekwondo is brilliant?

  • TKD is excellent left right coordination and makes the brain work in a repetitive fashion.
  • TKD is not divided by age and gender so there are role models and the kids can be a role model.
  • TKD is after school.
  • The cost of a term is equal to 2 sessions of any therapy that works on strength and coordination.
  • TKD is about mental strength. The kind of resilience a special needs kid has built in.
  • TKD works with the strength you have and builds on it.
  • TKD uses words like integrity and commitment.
  • TKD has a series of gradings that are worked towards and acknowledged in a grading.
  • There are many opportunities to complete a grading and achieve.

Protip: The dude that teaches a kid to kick people in the head and how to run from a fight needs to be a gentle moon-face Mr Miyagi and not a “finish him” Cobra Kai dick.

Why Swimming is the best

  • Swimming is weightless, low impact and injury free.
  • Swimming has levels to work through.
  • Swimming works on co-ordination and endurance.
  • Being underwater encourages peace to the worried mind.
  • Swimming is after school or on weekends.
  • The cost of a term is equal to 2 sessions of any therapy that works on strength and coordination.

Protip: Public pools are awesome hubs of community, and germs- get thongs, have spares in your car.

Why bushwalking is the answer

  • Bushwalking is a family activity that goes for as long or short as you need.
  • Bushwalking is portable and pace-able.
  • Bushwalking involves uneven surfaces to be navigated by the brain- proprioception gold mine.
  • Bushwalking strengthens muscles and builds fitness.
  • Bushwalking is outdoors, in nature which makes everyone feel better.
  • Bushwalking is also discovery and imagination.
  • Bushwalking allows for some parallel talks, and it never fails to bring up some kind of chatter I wouldn’t have other wise heard.

Protip: Geocaching (treasure hunting) is a good way to get and keep them going.

Training
Training
Training in the park
Training in the park
Grading
Grading

What the Frick Goes Into an Individual Learning Plan?

needs: why am I avoiding the new Individual Learning Plan (ILP)?

I’ve gone from being handed a pre-typed form to sign at the end of week 2 which I didn’t know was an ILP to having the school psych email me a draft ILP in term 4 the preceding year. Different schools and different teachers have had vastly different approaches to my girl and her ILP. On one hand you have someone discharging the school obligation to complete proforma paperwork and on the other you have a degree of support I have prayed for while crying in my car.

Last year was the first year at a new school. I was drunk with joy about the ILP experience. It was drafted before the school year started, we had time to review with our girl and for our specialists to include key strategies. After it was re-drafted, we got to approve it. It was rolled out to staff, with a notification to show it had been read.  At some stage in the first days, each teacher let our girl know they had read the plan. She whispered at bedtime “school was good, the help is there invisibly”. Relief, gratitude, relief, gratitude swept over me in waves that night.

I have always wanted to draft the ILP, to have doctors weigh in, and have ideal pre-term planning in place. Yet, here we are in week 2 of a new year, and I haven’t finalised my comments on the learning plan.  Why? It comes down to this: she is doing well. She is happy and strong and healthy. We all are. We’ve had a fun explosion summer and I’m not sure I can burst that bubble by looking at all the boxes of needs and strategies. I’m hiding from my fears for her, the list of to do’s and to don’ts. I am all duck and cover from those hard facts.  Freakin’ denial, strong stuff and I never see it coming.

So, this is the realisation: whether her school did a terrible ILP botch job, or a stellar wonderkind ILP (current school); it is tough on her and it is tough on me. The two of us sit between the teachers and the doctors and therapists and family and friends. We piece together the things that can and cannot be.  We draw strings between medication, injury, memory, proprioception, anxiety, her desire to have fun and feel good, to make friends, to keep up and learn, and mine to thwart avoidable disaster, to extinguish unfair expectations and mostly to provide support to those who help her.  It’s a lot to ask of one document, and right now it’s a lot to ask of me. Above all, every day at school is a lot to ask of her, and an ILP makes it a little bit easier. So, I need to get over it.

means: Recipe for an ILP in 10 steps.

  1. Assemble treats. I like a combination of sweets to gobble, and bold Florence + the Machine, while I am drafting, followed by watching Gilmore Girls episodes where Rory graduates (Chilton & Yale) for straight after. I bribe and reward myself.
  2. Format. Schools have their own format. If I cannot get a word version of their plan, I produce something they can cut and paste easily. So, I keep my format simple.
  3. Strengths. Deficiencies are not her story, what she loves and does best is her story. An ILP is an opportunity to remind my girl, myself and her teachers about her strengths.
  4. Diagnosis/Needs. I’m clear about my dude’s needs. I keep it simple and avoid over medicalising the language. I want this to be easily understood. I use terms she is comfortable with.
  5. Aims. I make the plan work for my dude. If our home aim is on spelling and shoe laces, (I never thought that would happen) then I use the plan to focus on maths and a social skill.
  6. Strategies at home. I list anything we are doing at home to support her needs. Cooking for maths, tutoring, therapy, playdates. Its good for them to know what she is working on, and for her to be given acknowledgement by her teachers for any extra work. 
  7. Strategies at school. School will have some. I try to eliminate the ones used generally across the class and include 2-3 at the most that are targeted to my dude’s needs. Again, less is more.
  8. Bring in the expert. I have her best and brightest specialist –the one she adores – review the ILP. Just knowing they had input helps her trust the ILP.  If the big kahuna adds one thing, it’s worth it.
  9. Ask the kid. The only person who can tell me about the classroom is my dude. I ask If you could change one thing to make school learning easier what would it be? The answer is never what I or the teacher expect but it is always has the most positive impact.
  10. Review date. I include one.

10 commandments to making the ILP work for my dude

  1. Make it easy on the teacher. I try to draft the ILP before the teacher has to do it from scratch.
  2. Get a copy. At a minimum, if it has been prepared, I ask for a copy.
  3. Read it before signing it. I remind myself, I have time. The ILP is not nuclear launch codes. “I’ll get this back to you” is what I say as I walk away with it.
  4. Talk to my kid about the ILP. If this is going to work for her, she needs to drive it.
  5. No background. My girl is more than diagnosis and tests. I delete any background that drowns out the strategies.
  6. Keep it simple. I aim for 2 aims, and 2-3 key strategies. Too much is too onerous and reduces the possibility of being incorporated in the classroom.
  7. Diarise. The date of the ILP and the date for review.
  8. Review the ILP. I review at the start of each term and email a meeting request to the teacher.
  9. Review the ILP with school. Sometimes I do this by email but its better in the classroom. Teachers know more than me about how the ILP is working and what needs to change.
  10. Celebrate when targets are met. I need to stop, recognise and of course, cup cakes for everyone.

10 common classroom hacks for ILP’s:

In addition to specific curriculum goals here are 10 things that can improve a school day.

  1. Pair my dude up for group tasks, bus sport and excursions rather than asking them to partner up, sometimes they need a break from not getting picked.
  2. Give my dude an early start with transition times between subjects so she doesn’t start last.
  3. Sit my dude near the board, or upfront, or near the teacher so she can be encouraged.
  4. Give her manageable classroom responsibility for self-esteem.
  5. If noise is an issue, send her to the library on an errand to give her a break. 
  6. Extra time for testing, or separate conditions for testing.
  7. Time and help to organise desk or locker to eliminate transition stress.
  8. Ask her to repeat instructions for the whole class to help them process the instructions.
  9. Modify homework to reflect goals of plan.
  10. Exclude homework if tutoring is being undertaken. Ask teacher to validate her additional work.